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Have you ever noticed that your ADHD spouse remembers all the little details you've already forgotten, while you can easily recall mundane but important information like when to pay the mortgage or file taxes? This difference really showcases how a neurotypical brain contrasts with a neurodiverse (ADHD) brain. I used to get upset when my ADHD spouse forgot crucial tasks—like the time our car got towed because he parked in a spot clearly marked 'Visitor Parking Only.' He never made that mistake again—no one wants to pay a $300 towing and storage bill!
Over time, I realized it’s not that he doesn’t want to remember; it’s just harder for him to keep track of all the mundane tasks that come so naturally to me. And you know what? That’s okay. We don’t need to have an exact replica of each other’s memory to function well as a couple. In fact, our different strengths complement each other. I remember the daily tasks and deadlines, while he brings a richness of detail to our shared experiences that I might otherwise overlook.
I've come to understand that we’re a team of two, each with our strengths. This realization has helped me move away from a limited mindset, opening up possibilities when we face challenges.
What about you? How do you and your partner balance remembering different types of information?
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